Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
