After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
At the doctor. They're doing a flu test now. He was like "where do you think you got this?" I said "bachelor party. Strippers." he goes "okaaaay I'll put 'other'."
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
