We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
