Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
