Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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