i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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