Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Mom said you looked used
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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