Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Randomize
