I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
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