just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
