Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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