dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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