Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
high people should be assigned attendants
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize