Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
