I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize