i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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