Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize