You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
