Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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