You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
