just come out here and I will go home with you...
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
