you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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