They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
