Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Randomize
