In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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