Small penises have feelings too.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
