I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
