Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
