Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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