i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
