I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
