I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
