Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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