what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
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