school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
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