I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
