Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize