They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
