the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
