she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize