you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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