Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
