Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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