i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
so much tequila, so little girl.
Randomize
