if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
COOKIE DOUGH CUPCAKES ARE A THING
Did you really just send me a blank text in response to news as awesome as that?
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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