I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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