You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
