He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Boobs are out for the taking
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
