just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
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