Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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