I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
home. puking in laundry basket.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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